>at dinnertime, i wish i lived in new york. all those choices. from dirt cheap to excessively expensive. perhaps many of the same choices exist here in the dallas area (i’m certain many of them do), but i cannot, on the spur of the moment, walk outside my door and get to any one of them in a matter of minutes by foot. that’s the special part. i have a few regular spots, but they are miles and gallons away.

what else do i miss? i miss my friends. i miss talking on the phone with them. i miss laughing over coffee or wine and sitting for hours just hanging out, wondering out loud. i know that we have to grow up, but is it absolutely necessary that we separate ourselves so terribly much? would it be out of the question to just plan a little reunion and take three or four days to just enjoy each other and our history together? some get weary of talking about the past, but without it, we would have no present and certainly no future. and i have had some really beautiful life moments just sitting and talking with long-time friends and finding out that we have some of the same questions, triumphs and struggles.

why do we abandon each other? certainly, it’s not on purpose. it must be some sort of natural progression. if we dip carefully into our past, it does not mean that we are regressing, taking steps backward. we should view it as a way of seasoning our present lives.

one of my good friends always talked about what she perceived as the very real danger of intermingling your “groups”. your work group with your going-out group. your church group with your life-long friends group. sometimes, it very much does not work. but i think the older we get, the more discerning we become, and if we are honest, there really is not all that much distinction among the members of each group. now, maybe it just has more to do with scheduling and real interests.

i am making some friends here now, and i wonder if i am having to convince myself that i am now capable of intermingling all those groups. now i know myself better, and i know who i want to spend my time with — and it’s all the same kind of person.

we should not let the written word take away our voices. we need to talk to each other. i need to call you. you need to call me. there’s a truth in the voice that can be masked in writing. let’s talk.